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Eleanor Henderson was returning from a book tour for her second novel when she decided it was time to write about her own true story, that of her marriage. Caring for her two sons and a chronically ill husband, “I didn’t really feel like I had much room in my imagination for anything else,” said Henderson.
She began the first chapter as soon as she got home; a chapter on seeing her husband, Aaron, go through another night of pain and torment. “It was common to have a night like this,” said Henderson, and she wanted to recognize those nights, she added, “even to myself.”
“All I have is yours: a wedding†tells the story of the couple’s life together; at its center is their struggle to understand and treat Aaron’s illnesses (ranging from drug addiction to undiagnosed psychological and physiological disorders). Aaron, to whom the book is dedicated, gave his blessing for Henderson to write the book, but said he probably wouldn’t read it.
“I had become very comfortable editing and organizing and presenting a kind of life that was true, but I forgot so much about the pain and the struggle,†said Henderson, who teaches writing at Ithaca College. “I was sick of it. I longed for the truth.
So far, she said, the response to the book has been “really gratifying.” Anyone, it seems, can relate to some aspect of an undiagnosed illness or caring for a loved one. Some want to diagnose: “I’ve had a few emails already from people who are pretty sure what’s wrong with my husband.
Henderson said she hopes the book will describe what it’s like in a long marriage. “I hope it resonates [the reader’s] her own experience of the complexities of trying to live alongside another person for decades, â€she added. “I hope this will bring empathy to people who live complicated lives.”
Eleanor Henderson will be in conversation with Joanna Rakoff (“My year Salingerâ€) At 7 p.m. Wednesday in a virtual event organized by Brookline Bookstore.
Kate Tuttle, writer and freelance critic, can be reached at [email protected].
